The Morning Routine You'll Learn to Love

We all have our own morning routines. Some include walking the dog, having coffee, watching the news, getting up before the sun, exercising, having breakfast, or even hitting snooze. Regardless of what your morning routine consists of, no one likes to think about it...especially on a Monday morning. But if you are an entrepreneur, your morning routine is the most important part of your day.

The daily routine of any small business owner or entrepreneur is jammed packed to max with calls, answering emails, going out on appointments, or working with employees. Most entrepreneurs' days begin very early and end very late. They are similar to sales reps, except entrepreneurs and small business owners have all the responsibilities of running and operating a business to worry about in addition to making sales and closing deals. This is why entrepreneurs need to begin their days off on the right foot.

Some entrepreneurs spend the evening the night before creating to-do lists, organizing their email inbox as much as possible, and checking their calendars for meetings, appointments, calls, deadlines, and tasks that are scheduled for the day. The next morning, some entrepreneurs start the day off right with some form of exercise. We all know exercise gets the blood flowing, increases energy, and boosts the body's metabolism. Studies have shown that morning exercise is when it is the most effective as it gives entrepreneurs energy to tackle the day ahead.

Of course, not all entrepreneurs and small business owners have the option to get up early, because in most cases, the time you get up depends on when you go to bed...unless you are one of those people that can function on very little sleep. So what about restaurant owners? Most restaurant owners don't go to bed until 3AM, especially during the weekends which are typically peak business times with customers. However, morning routines are all relative. For example, if an entrepreneur goes to bed at 3AM, waking up at 10AM the next morning could be equivalent to another entrepreneur's 5AM.

As an entrepreneur I can tell you that setting and sticking to a morning routine is tough. Most of you know that in addition to running my business, I also work a full time job that involves commuting a total of 90 minutes, one way, each day. I'm up at 4:15AM most mornings to get in at least 30 to 40 minutes of exercise. While I exercise, I'm on my iPad going over my calendar and email, all while mentally planning and anticipating my day. I'm dressed and out the door with the morning's first cup of coffee by 6AM, to be on the train by 6:34AM. I have at least an hour-long train ride, so I use that hour to get work done. By the time I sit down in the office by 7:30AM - 7:45AM, I'm ready for my next cup of coffee, my breakfast, and to start my full time job. 

My days end between 4PM and 5PM depending on the day and the season. Again, I use the hour train ride home to get work done. I'm typically home for the evening by 6PM and 7PM. I make myself a healthy dinner, play with the cats, and then it's back to my office (or my couch some nights) with my laptop for more of my business work. On slower or quieter evenings, sometimes I'll fit in an evening work out to unwind and relieve stress and tension from the day. I'm typically in bed by 9 - 9:30PM because I'm up so early the next morning.

In any given week, I work between 80 and 90 hours per week. And that's not a made up number or an estimate. The challenge sometimes is my family and friends. They often complain to me about my schedule. Why is my schedule so important? Why can't you come out with us? Why do you schedule things so tightly? My only reply is that it's the only way I can do both.

I have personally found that once I started incorporating a rigorous morning routine that I not only became healthier, but I developed a more positive and happier outlook on the day. It allowed me to get in the right frame of mind to tackle the day. I don't tell my own story to boast, but rather explain the sacrifices that are necessary to run your own business. And if I can do it, you can. Of course, not everyone's life is the same. Some of you have families, children, taking care of sick loved ones, or even work a part time job in the evenings. Even if you take 30 minutes for yourself each day, you'd be surprised what you can accomplish and how different you will feel.

Many entrepreneurs have similar stories to tell about how they go about their days and how they start their days. It's a choice, really. How you choose to start your day or the attitude you carry with you during the day is a choice, most of the time. Sure, we all have bad days. Sure, things happen that we can't control. And, sure, some days just flat out suck no matter what you do. But at the end of the day, literally, tomorrow is a new one. So start it out right.

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Written content: © 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010 J.H. Language Solutions

Tax Tips for Retirement

Are you trying to save for retirement? Who isn’t? Today it’s extremely difficult for families and individuals to save for retirement. It’s no secret that companies don’t offer pensions anymore, let alone match a halfway decent percentage to 401K programs, and social security is a joke. However, when considering retirement options, few of us consider taxes. The fact is taxes play an integral part in retirement planning.

When we look at our retirement accounts, we don’t consider having to pay taxes on that amount once we are at the age when we need to begin withdrawing. This goes for any 401K or IRA account. The best approach to this? Currently we all live on after tax dollars to provide ourselves with food, clothing, and shelter. We need to look at our retirement accounts the same way.

In fact, many 401K and IRA accounts work on a pre-tax basis. Meaning if a certain percentage of your paycheck goes into your retirement account each time you get paid, this is usually on a pre-tax basis. So when you are finally ready to withdraw from your retirement accounts, remember that this is now the point when you will need to pay taxes on that money…just like any other form of income.
However, it’s also important to remember that in addition to taking advantage of the pre-tax program at the front end of saving for retirement, most tax contributions to a 401K or IRA program are tax deductible.

On the other hand, a Roth retirement account allows retirees to begin withdrawing from that account on a tax-free basis, in addition to your taxable income, of course. However, money going into a Roth retirement is not tax deductible. Either way, we need to pay taxes on the money invested in retirement accounts, regardless of which you choose.

Finally, if you end up in a situation where you begin withdrawing money from another type of retirement account on a tax-free basis, it is recommended that you get in the habit of writing a check to the IRS on a quarterly or regularly basis as you never want to get hit with their fees or penalties or the legal proceedings that could inevitably follow due to tax evasion. This is no way you should spend your retirement.

Of course we aren’t licensed CPAs nor do we provide tax advice, so it is best to speak to a licensed and experienced financial planner or accountant to help you find the best retirement account that works for you. He or she can help determine how much you should invest, how much you will need (which will obviously depend on where you want to live, if you want to travel, living expenses, etc.), and how much you should withdraw on a yearly basis (the norm is about 3% to 4% of your savings per year, at the average retirement age of 66).

All in all, when working on your retirement planning, don’t forget to figure in taxes. You never want to put your retirement planning off as this will only hurt you in the long run. Be aware of the tax laws and how they affect you and how they could affect your retirement planning.


  
Written content: © 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010 J.H. Language Solutions
*This topic was written by J.H. Language Solutions for a third party. This article has been altered to fit this blog accordingly.  J.H. Language Solutions in no way assumes ownership of the content above. Topic posted by third party permission.

What Does New Years Mean For You This Year?

New Years has come again. It's time to say goodbye to another year, and look towards the next one. It's also the time of year when people begin thinking about making New Year's resolutions. Some people believe in this more than others. It is about setting goals for yourself in the new year; things that you would do differently. Will you make New Year's resolutions?


The most common New Year's resolutions include losing weight, exercising, or being healthier, or maybe striving to get a promotion at work, or starting a family. All in all, the new year can mean new changes in life. Changes you want to make, or maybe even changes that were supposed to happen, or that you made happen.

Normally New Years doesn't phase me. I never make plans, and for me it's always been just another day. But this year is different. On the way home from work two weeks ago, before my holiday vacation began, I lay on the train and stared out the window, listening to my iPod. I watched as the buildings of the city slowly faded away as the train drove west. I began to think of everything from the year. Ironically, I was listening to Tommy Lee's "Say Goodbye". Flashbacks, pictures, and memories flashed through  my head...like a screenplay. I began to think. The end of 2012 was quickly approaching. It was at that point that I realized that, for me personally, New Years this year is about saying goodbye. I've had to say goodbye to many people and many things. Some included close, personal relationships; an old family member that had passed on, as well as a significant piece of my childhood; several professional relationships; a marriage; and just an angry and unhappy "me" that is now gone...and that I won't miss.

As I wrote in a previous article, 2012 was the year of difficult decisions. I had to make several difficult, life-changing decisions. The decisions I made this year have and will no doubt affect the rest of my life. While a large part of me is nervous for these changes, as I always worry about making the right decisions, I'm also excited for the new paths and opportunities that may come my way in 2013. New Years definitely brings about changes in life.

I'm thankful for the opportunities that have come my way, some of which I have accepted, and others that I chose to pass up. I've had the privilege of meeting and working with some of the most fantastic people I've ever met. I'm truly thankful for those that I've met and for those that have entered and left footprints on my heart this year. Some have even re-entered my life and have enriched it even more. For those I'm also eternally grateful. I wish all those the best of luck and success in 2013.

In less than 24 hours, a new year will be upon us. Will I make New Year's resolutions? I think so. Mine include taking care of myself both physically and mentally, meeting certain professional, personal, and educational goals, and just being a happier and healthier person...which was definitely something I took for granted before.

So what about you? What have you or will you say goodbye to? What does the New Year mean for you? For some the new year may just be another year, or that tomorrow morning will be just another day. While this may be true, my advice to you is to do one thing different tomorrow. This could be not eating something you would normally eat, helping someone, complimenting another, or doing something different for yourself. You'd be surprised how minimal changes such as these can become contagious, and can start your new year off right. Happy New Year.




 © Carolyn Seelen | Dreamstime.com

 © 2010, 2011, 2012 Content written and owned by J.H. Language Solutions. Usage by written permission only.

Being Thankful

The holidays are upon us. Some of us feel excitement while others groan in exasperation because 1) holiday shopping still needs to be done, and/or 2) the holidays mean that another year is almost over, and we are all one year older. Whether you look forward to the holidays or you dread them, for one reason or another, they're here. In the midst of the confusion of shopping, cooking, wrapping, and traveling and dealing with the regular day-to-day routine on top of it all, it's really easy to lose the very essence of what the holidays are about and what they really mean. However, it doesn't have to be this way. Take some time to yourself and really think about what you are thankful for.

For me personally, I've named 2012 the year of tough decisions. However, now that the holidays and the end of the year quickly approaches, I look back and really feel like the decisions I've made were all the right ones. One thing I've learned this year was how important it is to take some time and care for yourself. I'm not talking in a selfish manner where everything is about you or any one person. Taking care of yourself is actually a very healthy thing. When you become so consumed by one thing in your life, be it a job, an obligation of some sort, or maybe even a person or relationship, you can become mentally and even physically unhealthy.

We've all heard the piece of advice, "you have to love yourself before you can love someone else." Most of us who have heard this often think, "what the hell does that mean?" Or some flat out disbelieve it. However, it's really true. If we take the time to truly care and love ourselves, we can then freely and openly give to others and really display compassion. Sure we can give to others, but if we aren't giving enough to ourselves, then we give out of spite or out of bitterness, and that's no way to love.

I know what you must be thinking...that all this sounds really selfish. I thought the same thing when I was first told this. But the more I paid attention and recognized this, the more I began to realize how true it really is. I'm not saying we should ALL put our needs before others', or that we are better than everyone else. That's not the point...because that IS selfish. The point is to recognize that you are important too. Your needs are just as important as others', you deserve love and compassion, and your happiness and health matters.

So in the next few days and in the next few weeks, try to take some time for yourself and think about what you want for yourself this holiday season. Maybe it's finding the time to exercise, or buying that new sweater, getting tickets to a game, working on professional development, or going out for a night with some friends. Either way, try to make time for yourself...and be thankful.




Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Holidays!


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Written content: © 2010, 2011, 2012, J.H. Language Solutions

What Dreams Are Made Of

Everyone has dreams.We all have dreams, whether we remember them the next morning or not. However, we each have had those dreams that stick with us: the recurring ones, the premonitions or the psychic ones, and the ones that contain messages at one point or another in our lives. So what do our dreams mean?

Some people think they don't dream. While we may not dream every night, it's very possible that we do in fact have a dream, we just don't remember it. Dreaming occurs during the Rapid Eye Movement (REM) point in our sleep patterns, which usually lasts approximately 90 minutes. Depending on certain beliefs or cultures, dreaming can be due to repressed thoughts or emotions or a mere result of images or events that have occurred in the day.

So what kinds of dreams are there?

Nightmares - We've all had nightmares at one time in our lives. More often than not we had nightmares as children, but they can also occur in adulthood. In fact, about 8% of the adult population still have nightmares on a regular basis. Nightmares are dreams that frighten us or play upon our fears. Some nightmares are so vivid they wake us up from a deep sleep and are often accompanied by heavy breathing or sweating. Some of the most common nightmares may include death, vehicle accidents, losing a loved one, being chased, or even our most basic fears.

Recurring - Recurring dreams are the dreams that you have had more than once. When this happens, you often wake up and think to yourself, "I know I've had that dream before." So what causes this? It is said that recurring dreams are trying to tell you something. This could be due to repressed emotions, anxiety, fears, or even anger. This is your subconscious trying to tell you that something in your life or in a particular situation needs attention. Recurring dreams may represent a certain situation or ongoing event in your life.

Precognitive - Precognitive dreams are dreams that some people have that predict future events. These types of dreams are probably among the most difficult to interpret or explain. Some believe these occur due to signs our body hint to us, such as a pregnancy or illness, or that a loved one that has passed is communicating with us, or other messages that a greater power may be instilling in our minds. Some also believe this is where the deja vu experience comes from.

Lucid - Lucid dreams are the types of dreams where in the middle of the dream you realize that you are dreaming. We've all had those dreams where we are in the middle of a situation or an event that is playing out and suddenly we literally think to ourselves "wait...this is a dream". Often times we are able to control the outcome of the dream with this realization.

While dreams may seem to occur totally at random, there may be reasons why. Some reasons can include the intensity level in which you are sleeping, stress or tension, or even something as trivial as what you ate before you went to bed. I knew someone who would have the craziest dreams if he ate Pepperidge Farm goldfish before going to bed. But if you are having dreams over and over that really stick with you or even bother you on a physical or emotional level, it may be time to look at your life and really focus on that particular area. This could be stress related to a job, a difficult family situation, a traumatic event, a relationship, or guilt in some cases. Any situation or thoughts that you may be repressing for one reason or another are surely to come out in your dreams.

Dreams have always been an area of interest to me. When people tell me weird dreams they've had, one of the things I do is go grab my dream book and figure out what the symbols in the dream mean. I actually sat with someone recently and that person started telling me all about his dreams. It started with, "Julie, I have to tell you about this weird dream I had the other night..." so after we looked up some of the symbols that occurred in his dream, we began to explore some of the other odd or scary dreams he's had in the last year. We came to the conclusion that this person was experiencing some real emotional turmoil where he felt like he wasn't reaching his full potential and felt like his aspirations were out of reach due to present obstacles.

For the last year or two I personally have been experiencing nightmares. I would have at least one nightmare per week. I started to think something was wrong with me. I would have awful nightmares...nightmares that were often violent or life-changing. Some of the nightmares I had involved death, being trapped in burning buildings, trapped in tornadoes, involved in train crashes, and even drowning. They were terrible. After doing some of my own research, I realized that the dreams I had were connected to feelings of being "out of control" and "trapped". After making some long overdue changes in my life, I no longer feel this way...and the nightmares have stopped.

Have you ever attempted to interpret one of your dreams? Sometimes we wake up in the morning and we think of the dream we had the night before and think "wow...that was weird!" The thing is, sometimes those "weird" elements may actually be symbols that are represented by repressed emotions or significant elements in our lives, whether positive or negative. Sometimes these elements can be hidden in odd images or events such as talking animals, creatures, or even the odd location of events, objects, or symbols. Meaning can be found in almost every instance.

One of the things you can do on your own is keep a journal and record all the vivid dreams or nightmares you have had recently or in a certain time period. You can purchase a dream book or you can refer to any online dream dictionary to interpret the symbols or situations in your dream. You will almost instantly recognize a pattern to them, which you should be able to attribute to your life in one form or another. Sweet dreams!

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Written content: © 2010, 2011, 2012, J.H. Language Solutions

What is the Most Important Element in a Marriage?

What does it take to make a marriage work? People have been asking this question for decades. Some say trust, respect, loyalty, forgiveness, or the ability to listen. Some even say "don't go to bed mad", or more comically, "lower your expectations". What do you think is the most important element in a marriage, or in any relationship for that matter?

The truth is the success of any marriage or relationship depends on the two personalities involved. It depends on the couples' priorities, values, and beliefs. For some couples it may be trust or respect or the ability to listen that works best for them. These no doubt are all crucial elements to a marriage. However, another biggie that is not often mentioned in these cases is communication.

It's truly amazing the problems that can arise from a lack of communication. It can cause problems in every aspect of your marriage or relationship...from finances, to raising children, to domestic chores, to romance and sex. All of these can leave a person feeling disconnected, disappointed, and lonely. Only at this point does a partner often sink into loneliness and despair, where he or she feels disrespected, taken advantage of, or just plain hurt. Some even look outside a relationship or marriage for intimacy...whether it is physical or emotional. Partners don't necessarily do this to be resentful or deceitful, but when you feel unhappy or like you aren't connecting with your partner, it is only natural for you to begin thinking about someone else or maybe a way out completely.

While infidelity is among the top ten reasons for couples to divorce or even break up, communication is also on that same list. And I bet ten to one that in many instances infidelity can be directly linked to communication, or lack thereof, in one form or another. I'm sure there are cases out there where infidelity is caused for selfish reasons. I am in no way defending or promoting infidelity in any way. I just believe the real, underlying problem is often communication...and it is sad that so many couples face this but do not realize what the real problem is.

Communication is an extremely vital element in marriage that is often overlooked. It is a biological fact that men and women have two completely different styles of communicating. There's no way around this. However, there are ways we as humans and partners can deal with it. One of the most effective ways is to practice empathic listening. Empathic listening is listening to another person speak and focus solely on what the person is saying. When you are in the middle of a heated discussion it is often difficult to put aside your own emotions to listen to the other, especially when you are angry or upset, or even in the middle of an emotionally charged situation. But this step is crucial in order to really listen or reach your partner and avoid arguments. It is also important to take turns speaking and listening so each person gets his or her own time to talk and listen...that way both sides are heard, recognized, and respected. Unfortunately, we do not develop this skill in our childhoods. At least most of us don't. This skill needs to be practiced and learned in order for it to really work effectively.

So what do I know about this? I've been married for a little less than three years and I've only been with my husband for a total of six years, so I couldn't possibly understand the problems couples face who have been married or have been together for ten, twenty, or thirty or more years...nor am I trying to. I simply felt it was appropriate to blog on this topic as this is one of the most crucial items I've learned in only a few years of marriage. I've also learned in that time that this is an area where many couples find difficulty.

However, I can comfortably say that in my three years of marriage, my husband and I have dealt with problems, I mean real problems that some do not face in a lifetime. My husband and I have faced impaling illnesses, injuries, job loss, family deaths or illnesses, moving, financial struggles, separations, court hearings, and we became a step family...all in the matter of a few years. Now that we approach our third year wedding anniversary, we are run down, weary, and feel like we are about fifty years old. We are plain old sick and tired of life...already. Unfortunately, these issues have come between us more than we would have liked. However, in the worst times, we have found that practicing effective communication really and truly is the way out.

Sometimes it's just a matter of feeling like you've got another person on your side at all times. It is even worse when you have to face these issues and you can't really connect with the other person about your fears or concerns. Then you feel like you are dealing with the problems all on your own...which can be a recipe for disaster. These situations can often raise "red flags" in the mind of a person. At that point you begin thinking, "well, I might as well be on my own since I feel that way anyways." It doesn't have to be that way...no matter how bad things may seem.

What causes a lack in communication? This can be difficult to decipher. Again, it really depends on the person. We are already at a disadvantage since men and women communicate differently. One of the most common issues that arise is the woman's need to vent, and the man's need to fix. Often times a woman will come home from work and vent about her day. At this point she may be speaking passionately or may be "fired up" about something that may have happened at work. While this is happening, the man is thinking of ways to "fix" the situation...so he may offer advice such as "why don't you look for another job?" or "why don't you tell your co-worker to mind his/her own business?" This can commonly come across to the woman that the man is annoyed with her for complaining. She may retort with "I don't want another job, you aren't listening!" And thus an argument begins. Men need to understand that more often than not, a woman just wants to vent; to get things off her chest. One the other hand, women need to understand that the man wants to "fix" the situation...because ladies, it is true that men who really love us just want us to be happy. To avoid this, women can often tell her partner, "I don't want you to feel like you have to 'fix' anything, I just need to listen." A lot of times this can help as the man suddenly feels "off the hook" and he knows that the only thing he needs to do is listen.

This is probably a very straight forward example. However, it would be naive to think that this is the only situation that causes arguments. When you have been with someone for a significant amount of time, you learn their "trigger objects" or what sets them off. In many relationships one person can unintentionally set the other person off. For example, you may scream or swear at another driver who cuts you off or may have almost caused an accident. Your anger may make the other person who is sitting in the passenger's seat feel uneasy or uncomfortable. The partner in the passenger's seat may make an angered or negative comment, maybe because he or she is acting out of fear or apprehension. Then, that reaction will set off the already angered driver...ultimately resulting in another argument. And so the vicious cycle continues. While this may also be another naive example, you can apply this situation to other more intense emotionally charged situations. In cases where a partner may feel unloved, ignored, or not cared for, it could be a simple case where the other partner's behavior is misinterpreted. Maybe the other partner isn't sure of what the others' needs are, or how to react when the other is upset. Maybe one partner feels like the other wants to be left alone when the other needs romance or compassion. Again, all this can be resolved with communication.

I know, easier said than done, right? Communication is not an easy thing to instill in a relationship or marriage. It takes practice and a lot of work. But any marriage or relationship that is worth it to you will be worth the time. It's difficult to break this cycle and get on the right path...the path that leaves to healthy and effective communication which equals more love and understanding and compassion for both partners.


Copyright: 2012, J.H. Language Solutions

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Cruel Summer

The summer is in full swing. The sun and heat are blazing; pools and beaches are the coolest places to be; hotdogs, hamburgers, and lemonade are constantly out of stock at supermarkets; and every weekend the highways are jam packed with long weekend getaways, trips to the beach, and road trip vacations. What are your summer plans? Maybe your preferred summer activities include camping, or reading a romance novel on the beach, or sitting by the campfire at night roasting marshmallows, or canoeing on a lake, or going to a concert.

I recall when the summer was my favorite time of year. I never cared about the heat or the humidity or the storms. I looked forward to it every year. However, in the last six years, the summer became such a difficult time for me. It always brought up memories of financial strain; job loss, or the complete opposite, working TOO much; and just never really having the time to enjoy anything. If I had known that after college ended my life would completely change, I would have sucked up every drop of that last summer and savored it like a fresh fruit salad.

In the last six years, my life has completely changed. I graduated from college and moved away. I met the love of my life and got married. And I found a job that sucks the life out of me during this time of year. As most of you already know, I work in publishing...and this time of year is when we need to fulfill all our orders for the start of school at the end of August and in early September. So while everyone else is off on their vacations, I'm putting in long evenings and weekends.

My purpose of this blog isn't to complain. It's more of recognizing a piece of my childhood that I didn't realize slipped through my fingers. I think what brought me to this realization was the recent weekend trip I made to Maine to visit my parents. It made me realize that I was no longer a child off wondering on summer vacation. It made me long for it. We were also reminiscing about the vacations we took as a family each year. The places we visited; where we stayed; and those funny memories you never seem to forget no matter how old you get. After I got home Sunday afternoon, I don't remember a time when I had felt so alone. That was it. I was all grown up. And at some point when I made the cross between child to adult, I gave up my summers.

There are obviously plenty of things that adults can enjoy during the summer as well. I still enjoy trips to the beach...in fact, the beach is probably my favorite place to be. I don't think there's anything else I love more than sitting in the warm sand on the beach, hearing the ocean in the background, and reading. I also love gardening and digging in the dirt in my backyard. I do get opportunities to travel on the weekends as well as outdoor day trips. I just feel like sometimes I'm missing something greater.

It's July 17th. It's going to be about 100 degrees today...with about 98% humidity. The summer is in full swing. Here is my opportunity to plan some summer activities to get myself out and enjoy life...and the summer. After all, the summer is my favorite time of year. And here's my chance to get what little I have back.

So what are your summer plans? Summer time isn't just for kids. I hope you are doing everything you love to do during the summer. In fact, you better not even be reading this blog. You should be at the beach, or on the road, or out on some wild outdoor adventure. Enjoy your summer, and be safe!